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Penny Dreadful "Little Scorpion" Review: Desolation Vacation (PHOTO RECAP)
Penny Dreadful S02E07: "Little Scorpion"
Sometimes you just gotta get out of town, man. Could be your neighborhood's too loud or hot, or maybe Theresa in accounting won't get off your BACK about invoices. Meanwhile your kids won't do their chores and your dog nearly bit your hand clean off. Or maybe your stress is related to something as simple as being relentlessly pursued by a coven of witch jerks who have made an unflattering voodoo doll version of you. It's these kinds of life scenarios that call for an impromptu road trip, a last-minute booking via Airbnb, anything to shake ourselves out of the routine. But in Vanessa and Ethan's case, getting out of town doesn't mean your problems won't follow. So in "Little Scorpion," which saw Vanessa return to that weird witch house in the bog with a lycanthropic hunk in tow, we saw firsthand that when it comes to Victorian London monster problems, perhaps a staycation works just as well.
As an episode "Little Scorpion" wasn't exactly the most propulsive; it worked mainly as a stopover before the end-season fireworks begin. But for those who really like that simmering romantic tension between Vanessa and Ethan, it was a great, cozy, romantic, and heartbreaking episode. Plus, we finally got to see Ethan chase down and consume a baby lamb in the moonlight, so that was pretty fun. And Vanessa finally cracked that evil grimoire and traded in her everlasting soul so that some German Shepherds would eat a dick. But why list off this episode's highlights when I can SHOW them to you!
It was the morning after Ethan chained himself up in the basement and turned into a wolf man, and he was still so mad about it that he just pouted on the floor while Sembene tried to cheer him up.
Sembene had a speech about how where he comes from (Milwaukee?) animals who eat other animals become two animals. Or something? It was a metaphor. Anyway, he felt that Ethan was a good person and would remain himself no matter what. This friendship is very touching.
But what was NOT a touching friendship moment was when Sir Malcolm turned into a jerk and accused Vanessa of hallucinating last week's ballroom blood rain due to having PMS. Even Dr. Frankenstein was like, "Whoa, guy." Ever since Sir Malcolm shaved off his sweet goat, he'd been acting differently, and accusing Vanessa of imagining very real and normal evils was especially lame on his part. Knowing Sir Malcolm could no longer be trusted, Vanessa made a bold decision.
It was vacation time! She DID have that weird house in the middle of nowhere that Patti LuPone had given her, so it seemed like a good time for a vacation. Fortunately Ethan seemed into the idea and it would be a fun impromptu getaway for both of them. Or would it???? (It wouldn't.)
I liked when Vanessa trusted Victor with her whereabouts and no one else. But mostly because it gave her the opportunity to razz him one more time about having a crush on his cousin. I don't know why, but it's always so amusing to see Vanessa set aside her concerns of being possessed by the Devil to get in a little bit of girl talk. It's just really charming is all.
Not quite as charming was that house she took Ethan to. Yep, it's still run-down and foreboding, like something out of a Tim Burton cheese-before-bedtime dream. But here's the thing, and it should not come as a shock: Vanessa and Ethan had a GREAT TIME together.
Look at the expression on her face when Ethan regaled her with one of his countless tales of genocide-related heroics. She is positively glowing. Definite crush action going on here. And for his part Ethan seemed to really appreciate having the freedom to do occasionally run outside, transmogrify into a wolf man, and eat sheep.
So it was a pretty relaxing and much-needed vacation at first. And the activities didn't end there! They walked around finding delicious treats to eat.
Ethan got in some good romantic hero exercise (chopping down a tree in damp long johns) after Vanessa announced that she hated all trees.
In this case she hated this tree because it was the one that Patti LuPone was tied to when she was lit on fire, but I laughed out loud when Vanessa went on to say that she hated all other trees also, without exception. (Even Christmas trees, you monster?!)
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